What if?

I rarely ever allow my mind to stay on a thought that is going to cause me to become anxious. Thinking about a possible outcome in the future that would be bad. There is very little probability that the scene worked out in our heads will even happen so justifying the thinking on the basis of coming up with a solution should it happen is a waste of mental energy. When my mind drifts over to thinking about a possible negative event I start reviewing Bible verses that I have memorized or I start praying for my kids and grandkids from the oldest to the youngest. But today I have had a very difficult time pulling my brain away from thinking “what if” concerning Patty’s hip replacement surgery tomorrow. I know lots of people have had the surgery very successfully but it is still major surgery. I won’t bore you with all the many different outcomes I imagined in my mind and how they played out. I got so mentally weary of continually jerking my mind back from the edge of anxiety and despair that for a bit of time I just gave into it and imagined the worst possible outcome. I decided to go to my office and work on my sermon for this weekend in case things worked out so I wouldn’t have much time this week. Sermon study, thinking, and writing is a total and complete focused time for me. I am in another world and nothing breaks into that world until I choose to surface for a break or I declare it finished. My sermon this weekend is about knowing God in a very real, genuine way and the result of that intimate relationship with the Almighty, Omniscient, holy creator of the universe. I finished the sermon and was quite pleased with what I believed was a good time of God giving me words that came from Him. So far this afternoon I have not had any problem with anxious thinking. We are leaving the house at 4:45 am so that Patty can be checked in by 5:30 am.

4 thoughts on “What if?

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