Patty and I drove up to Trout Lake, Washington today to visit my Mom. She was doing pretty good, but there was a very noticeable increase in weakness and just being frail. I know it is coming and I am mentally prepared, but it will be a vary sad day when my Mom dies. As we were driving back home this evening I got to thinking about all the men in our church who are my age (70) or older, most who are really good friends, and many who have been in the church working and serving with me for 20 years and longer. I was curious so I pulled out a directory and counted 75 guys 65 years old and older. There are probably going to be a bunch of my friends who die in the next 20 years if I live that long. The Bible says I am able to handle family and friends dying easier than others in the world who have no faith because I am going to heaven and my friends and family are as well. It is going to be a interesting time when my friends and I stand around in heaven telling stories about the good old days.

Patty and I are on the road this beautiful, sunny morning on I-5 just about ready to exit on 205 and there is an accident so the traffic is creeping along at a snails pace, and the freeway sign we just passed said it was going to take an hour to get to I–84. Oh well, Patty is driving and I am drinking coffee and writing this blog so I will choose to be patient and to enjoy the leisurely time. “Choose to be patient”, and “choose to enjoy”, can I do that? Sure I can, I don’t have to let circumstances control my life. The Bible uses the phrase “put on”, like we would choose what we will wear, so we can “put on” or choose to act a certain way in spite of events and emotions.

Colossians 3:12-13 put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other

The problem is many don’t choose how they act, they just do what their “flesh” or “self” dictates or pulls them towards, they do the natural or automatic thing. People who act according to the impulse of their flesh which is prompted by circumstances and events around them will have regular times of conflict and misery in life.

The first step is to acknowledge the fact that we can choose how we act and respond to life problems, no matter how big they may be. Then to acknowledge the fact that there is a right, good and best way to act in every situation. As we start to be one of those who choose to “put on patience” we will find that the pull of our “flesh” to be irritated, angry, and impatient is strong and we will have to “choose” over and over again. As we do that we will eventually train ourselves to be patient and we became a person with the character trait of patience.

The really cool thing for me as a follower of Jesus is that as I pursue the right, good, and best way of acting I have the power of God available to me so I can confidently say ” I can”. Life change and growth won’t be quick or easy, but it will be sure as I continue to “choose”.

When I was in my first 10 years of pastoring I sought advice from just about every pastor I knew on a regular basis. There were a couple of reasons why I did this, the first was because of an intense desire and longing to get better in every area as a pastor. That insatiable thirst for improvement and growth as a pastor drove me to seek for advice and counsel from anybody and everybody who would give it. The second reason is an extension of the first, in that I had a genuine concern for people and their problems. I wanted to be able to help people have good marriages, I wanted to share the gospel so clearly and compellingly that many would believe it and become part of God’s family, and I wanted people to be exceptionally fulfilled as they lived the Christian life for God. I also had a very strong belief in the power of counsel as a source of wisdom in life. Now after 42 years pastoring I find myself in the position of being the one who gives the advice and counsel to those who want it. I enjoy very much coaching guys in ministry who are teachable and humble and will easily learn, change, and grow. There are many who I see struggling in their jobs, their marriage, and with their kids, but are to proud to ask for advice, and so they continue to fail.

Patty came home at 2:00 am this morning from her trip to Mexico with friends. She was gone for almost 2 weeks, and it was sure nice to have her back home and in my life again. This evening when I got home from the church working I suggested we go out to dinner for a celebration date, and get caught up on conversation. Patty responded by saying that she really didn’t want to go any place, she just wanted to stay home. Of course I got my feelings hurt, and after I pouted for awhile she said, I really would like to go out to dinner with you if we can go someplace where we can go like we are, and not have to shower and change, so we went to the “Jefferson Station” and I had rib eye steak, and she had a huge taco salad. The cool thing about “The Jefferson Station” is that it is 5 minutes from our house, we can go as we are, and the food is great. As we sat talking and eating, I thought, ” I sure have a good wife”. My marriage is a major source of emotional energy for me, and all the energy that I lose each day as I minister to hurting people, Patty restores. Way back in 1988 we went to a Steve and Annie Chapman concert and they sang a song entitled “Cup of Love” and the key words were “keep his cup full” and “keep her cup full”. We have worked hard to do that over the almost 50 years of marriage. Me being the romantic husband that I am looked up the song on “You Tube” and played it to Patty, and she responded by saying, “oooooooooooooh our theme song”!

In all the years of marriage counseling that I have done most of the time the wife blames the problems of their marriage on the husband and the husband blames them on the wife. In the past when we have had marriage problems I will determine that I am 100% the problem, but before I can say that to Patty, she will beat me to the punch and say “I am such a rotten wife, please forgive me”. It is so fun to make up after that. 😀

We are having a marriage retreat at Odell Lake Lodge with great food and fellowship, and Patty and I will be teaching 3 sessions during the weekend of April 5th, 6th, and 7th. Go to our website at http://www.jbc.church and click on the “Marriage Retreat” logo and register to go.

God is alive and well, and very much involved in all the details of our life. A major activity of our God as He works to grow us into the character of Jesus is to reward and bless good behavior and choices, and to discipline and curse bad behavior and choices. We can totally mess up and short circuit this plan and strategy of God to make us like Jesus by one activity, that is to blame others for the consequences that God brings into our life for our poor choices, and to consider it luck when someone else succeeds because God blesses them for their good choices. Such an attitude makes it impossible for us to learn how to live and act in a way that pleases the Lord and to grow in character. This plan of God of reward and consequence can result in very rapid growth if we humbly recognize that we are the cause, and thoughtfully connect the dotes between our behavior and the events that occur in our life. As individuals, we often attribute the success of others to luck or circumstances and make excuses for our own failures. We blame our own poor performance on bad luck, circumstances beyond our control, or others. Total responsibility for failure is a difficult thing to accept, and taking ownership when things go wrong requires extraordinary humility and courage. But doing just that is an absolute necessity to learning, growing as a person.

It started with Adam and Eve when Adam blamed Eve when confronted by God about what he had done, and Eve blamed the serpent. So we have this proneness to blame others in our DNA, we inherited it from Adam. That does not mean we are stuck with it, but it does mean that it won’t be easy to conquer this natural desire to blame others and not to take responsibility for our mistakes and the consequences that always come into our life when we do wrong.

Develop the discipline of every night before going to sleep, of examining your life, decisions, behavior, and choices, for that day, owning the responsibility for doing them, not blaming, not even a little bit, and confessing them to God.

Psalms 51:17 The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; A broken and a contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.

Isaiah 66:2 But to this one I will look, to him who is humble and contrite of spirit, and who trembles at My word.

It was nice having a break today, compliments of the snow that fell last night. But tomorrow it is back at it, running the race that is ours to run with endurance and faithfulness. A break is a very good thing if the rest results in renewed effort as we go back to the old grind of life. But with some the break creates a break in momentum, and they get in the race with less enthusiasm and even a bit of resentment to their particular lot in life. At this point it is important to coach ourselves with good self-talk to be grateful for all that God has blessed us with, especially our job, our responsibilities, our family, and our disciplines.

A key part of my self-coaching and self-talk is reciting in my mind verses I have memorized, and one of my key ones is Colossians 3:23-24 Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance. It is the Lord Christ whom you serve.

I turn that verse into a prayer to God for strength and a commitment to God to be faithful. “Dear Lord, today I will do everything heartily as I work to please You in all that I do, please help me to do that. I am looking forward with great anticipation to the day I see You for the first time, I will work and live today as if it is the last one I have before I stand before You, and I want with all my heart for Your words to me to be “well done, good and faithful servant”. Please grant me Your strength today to serve You with great passion and success. I love You!

This is the view off of my back porch of my back yard. It has been awhile since we have had this much snow. We cancelled everything at church today so I am doing something I haven’t done for awhile, I am staying in bed all day long. I have a bed that is like those in hospitals that lifts up in the back and my feet lift up as well, so I have it adjusted just right with my heating blanket on high, and I am going to read, write, pray, and work on my Scripture Memory. I will get up occasionally for a snack and a cup of coffee. It is kind of nice being a sluggard, a sloth, and a lazy poop for a day.

If you want to do an interesting Bible study, use your Bible search program on your computer, I-pad, or smart phone, and do a word search on sluggard and sloth. There are about 20 verses, mostly in the book of Proverbs that describe these very lazy people.

Proverbs 6:9-11 How long will you lie down, O sluggard? When will you arise from your sleep? A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest”— your poverty will come in like a vagabond and your need like an armed man.

Whooooeeeeeeeee, that sounds like me today 😀 We all are born lazy, and diligence is a character trait that God greatly admires, and one that we have to work hard at developing. The problem is that Sloths and Sluggards don’t like to work hard so they stay Sloths and Slugs unless they get some counsel and accountability in their life long enough to get them over the hump. Blessed is the person who had good parents who instilled the character trait of diligence in them as they grew up. Even though I had great parents who taught me well to love working hard, a day like today can entice me into another one, and then another, and before I realize it I am a lazy pig.

I have been doing a little fix up work on our church parsonage as Brandon and his wife Emma are going to be moving into it. Brandon is on staff part-time at JBC as the pastor of Evangelism and Outreach, he also does the follow-up with visitors, and is in charge of the Small group ministry. I left a bunch of my tools, all my Rigid Cordless tools, in the house and someone broke in a stole them all. I don’t think there are many things that tic me off as much as when someone steals from me. I work hard at not getting upset about anything and not allowing myself to think circular thoughts that are negative, angry, bitter, or vengeful, and to stop praying for those who stole my tools to be infected with chicken pox, shingles, and gout all at the same time, but it took me most of last evening to get a grip on my self-talk. What I do to control my wrong thinking and self-talk is memorize Bible verses and set my mind on those verses and meditate on them whenever I go back to “stinkin thinkin”. I thought these verses were appropriate.

2 Peter 3:10-13 But the day of the Lord will come like a thief, in which the heavens will pass away with a roar and the elements will be destroyed with intense heat, and the earth and its works will be burned up. Since all these things are to be destroyed in this way, what sort of people ought you to be in holy conduct and godliness, looking for and hastening the coming of the day of God, because of which the heavens will be destroyed by burning, and the elements will melt with intense heat! But according to His promise we are looking for new heavens and a new earth, in which righteousness dwells.

One of two things will happen to end our life here on this planet as we now know it, either we will die or Jesus will return, and we have no clue on either one, but

Hebrews 9:27 says, “And inasmuch as it is appointed for men to die once and after this comes judgment,”

So, though we don’t know when, it is so important that we are ready, eternally important.

Strong people can carry a heavy load of responsibility. Strong people don’t grumble, whine, complain, or feel sorry for themselves. Strong people accomplish a lot with their life. Strong people can help, support and encourage those who are weaker than themselves. Strong people can take all kinds of verbal abuse, and have their rights violated, and not get to uptight or upset about it. The command in the Bible to be strong is given almost 50 times so it is important to God.

Deuteronomy 31:6 “Be strong and courageous, do not be afraid or tremble at them, for the Lord your God is the one who goes with you. He will not fail you or forsake you.”

How does a person become weak? No one decides to become a weak person, it just happens over time.

Matthew 7:13-14 Enter through the narrow gate; for the gate is wide and the way is broad that leads to destruction, and there are many who enter through it. For the gate is small and the way is narrow that leads to life, and there are few who find it.

Our desire for comfort prompts us to take the easy way when choices come into our life, and after awhile those seemingly unimportant little choices have chipped away at our strength, resolve, discipline, and self-control. We skip a work out and then another. We sleep in a little later. We eat what we shouldn’t, just once and then one more time. And then, without realizing it we wake up and you have become something you really never wanted to become. Instead of being a strong person you are weak. Instead of being disciplined you are lost and confused. Instead of moving forward you are moving backwards. And what is sad is that it all happened without you even recognizing that it was happening. How? Insignificant little things that shouldn’t matter, but that do.

Of the 26 character traits that I rotate through focusing on 1 each week, patience is one that I recognize how very important it is in my life in pursuit of healthy, growing relationships. As my patience with people goes up, my proneness to irritation and anger will go down. As my patience with people goes up, my influence in their lives will go up. As my patience goes up, my enjoyment in the time I spend with people goes up, and their enjoyment in fellowshipping with me goes up as well. Patience is built on the awareness that there are no perfect people including me, and imperfect people do dumb things. Imperfect people will do things that are hurtful, rude, and inconsiderate, all people do them, including me. Patience is understanding that everybody starts at zero and and that most of us are growing from zero to 100, we all are on a journey towards full maturity, being perfect in character as Jesus is. Patience is knowing that I am ahead of a lot of people in my growth, and a lot of people are ahead of me. We all are on a journey towards Christ like behavior and character, and we all are in a different place. I have memorized this verse, and I meditate on it often so that God’s power will work in me, and make me a patient person in reality.

Matthew 7:12 In everything, therefore, treat people the same way you want them to treat you, for this is the Law and the Prophets.