I am getting older physically every day. From birth to about 30 I got progressively stronger, more coordinated, and smarter. From 30 to about 60 I pretty much held my own in regards to what I could do and how I felt. From 60 to 72 it has been a fairly steady decline in what I am able to do and how I feel. I imagine the next 15 years will be pretty much the same as the last 12 years. I became a member of God’s family when I was 13 and I began to grow on the inside in the way of character and I think I have had pretty steady growth since then. There were a couple of time blocks that I plateaued, a couple when I back slid a little, and then some periods in my life that I grew at a higher than normal pace, but for the most part it has been a steady rate of growth similar to what I experienced physically in my first 20 years.

The goal that I have is that before I die or before Jesus returns, whichever comes first, that I will be perfect. The word perfect in the Bible doesn’t mean sinless; it means grown-up in character, fully mature. It is God’s will for each of us who claim to know Him and love Him.

Philippians was one of the last books that the Apostle Paul wrote, probably when he was about 64 years old, and Nero martyred him when he was about 65 years of age. In the letter, Paul says that he was not yet perfect; he is pressing on toward being perfect. Paul, by this time, has written most of his letters that are part of the Bible, he started many churches and has lived a great life for God, but he felt he still had some more growing to do.

Philippians 3:12-14 Not that I have already obtained it or have already become perfect, but I press on so that I may lay hold of that for which also I was laid hold of by Christ Jesus. Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

So, I can say with confidence that ”I have not already obtained it or have already become perfect, ” in fact I would say that I have a long way to go, but I would say along with Paul, ”I press on toward the goal of being perfect, of being what God planned for me when I was born again.”

”I press on, ” twice Paul says that in this passage. It means to put out extreme effort, and that is what I want to do, that is what I intend to do.

I am teaching a class on prophecy Sunday mornings at 10:15 am, and it is being “live-streamed” and you can watch it on YouTube live or any time after that. I enjoy teaching and even more I enjoy the study that I need to do in order to do a good job teaching. Prophecy, what God has planned for the future is a fascinating subject. A third of the Bible is prophecy so evidently it is an important topic to God. He has planned out the future and as God is perfectly able to carry out His plans. There are lots of opinions on the information recorded in the Bible based on varying hermeneutical methods and presuppositions, but there is only one true and accurate interpretation and I want to be able to discover that and teach it clearly and understandably in my class so that each person is motivated to live their life with a sense of urgency. A major reason to study this topic is that recognizing that the events that are happening rapidly around us daily are not just out of control craziness by people but the very plans of God. The study of hermeneutics gives a person a strong sense of security knowing that it has all been planned out by God in advance and I am in His family and He will take care of me and take me to heaven.

Isaiah 46:9-11 Remember the former things long past,
For I am God, and there is no other;
I am God, and there is no one like Me,
Declaring the end from the beginning,
And from ancient times things which have not been done,
Saying, ‘My purpose will be established,
And I will accomplish all My good pleasure’;
Calling a bird of prey from the east,
The man of My purpose from a far country.
Truly I have spoken; truly I will bring it to pass.
I have planned it, surely I will do it.

I love taking my IPad calendar and filling up every hour of every day with something. Some of the things I write down in some of the time slots are pretty general, such as, “yard work”, or “study”, but it is something. I read all of my 73 goals and then I do some calendar work, then I read my goals again and then fill in some more blanks in the calendar. I try to keep 10 months generally filled up, the next 6 months more so, and the closest 3 months totally planned. When I get 3 months completed I pray, “ Dear Lord Jesus, this is what I believe is your will for my life, and I am committed to pursuing it with all my might. If you want to direct me in a different way on anything that I have planned I am open and willing and I am listening and paying attention to any changes you want to make in my plans.”

Proverbs 16:3 Commit your works to the Lord
And your plans will be established.

Psalms 37:5 Commit your way to the Lord,
Trust also in Him, and He will do it.

Proverbs 16:9 The mind of man plans his way,
But the Lord directs his steps.

The rewards of planning as much of my future as possible is that I gain momentum and motivation reading what my plans are for the next day, the next week, and the next month. My use of time gets much more organized and precise having planned out my entire day ahead of time. I can anticipate problems, road blocks, and needs much more accurately and plan accordingly thus preventing them or at least be prepared to solve them as quickly as possible.

I know that there are some things that I do that very few people will ever start doing no matter how much I encourage them to pick up the discipline. Writing goals that cover most of your life and that will use up all of your time and energy, and then filling up the calendar with activities that are part of the strategy to accomplishing your goals seems like such a basic way to pursue a successful life, but very few do it and very few can be talked into doing it. I wonder why? I will keep trying.

John 11:11-14 Jesus said to His disciples, “Our friend Lazarus has fallen asleep; but I go, so that I may awaken him out of sleep.” The disciples then said to Him, “Lord, if he has fallen asleep, he will recover.” Now Jesus had spoken of his death, but they thought that He was speaking of literal sleep. So Jesus then said to them plainly, “Lazarus is dead,”

Every night when I put my head on my pillow I say, “Lord Jesus, I know one of these days I am going to die just like I am going to sleep now, and instead of waking up and seeing Patty, I will wake up and see You. I am ready and anxious for that to happen. Please give me more to do for You tomorrow or take me home tonight, I only want to stay if it means fruitful labor for You.”

Praying that prayer every night does a couple of things for me. The first thing is that it takes away all fear of dying and therefore all fear, because the fear of dying is the soil all other fears grow out of. I am not afraid of COVID, I am not afraid of cancer, I am not afraid of Parkinson’s, and I am not afraid of failure. Declaring my faith in God every night, declaring my faith in His care for me and that He has my life planned out every night, declaring my faith in eternal life in heaven with Him every night, and declaring my desire to bear more fruit for Him every night results in my faith growing, my passion and fire to do more growing, and my joy growing.

Repeating basic truths often and regularly causes those truths to become dominate in our thinking and then to fill our heart, soul, or inner person making us strong, confident, and happy people. Proverbs 23:7 says, “what a person thinks about most of the time determines who they are.”

We can choose what we think about, the command to “set our qmind on the things above,” is given numerous times in the Bible. We can by default let the world and the people around us dictate what we think about. We can, by simple passivity, allow the devil and his demons to influence to a high degree what we think about. Or we can allow God to control our thinking by reading His Word the Bible faithfully, daily is best, and to systematically memorize it, the Bible is the very mind of Christ.

So I am choosing to think about death as a graduation into a wonderful life with Jesus, and the postponement of death to be many opportunities to do more for Him that matters for all eternity. I am choosing to do that every night when I go to sleep.

2 Timothy 3:1-4 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come. For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good, treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,

I wonder how much worse things will get? This is a very intimidating list, “treacherous, brutal, haters of good, and reckless.” I wonder how many people will actually be like that, and how close they will live to me? Now it is on the News and the worst is in Portland and other major cities. The people I know and fellowship with are good, loving, and nice. The people I see in Jefferson, Lebanon, Scio, Albany in Home Depoe and Sportsman’s Warehouse seem pretty decent and easy to get along with.

This passage starts out with “realize this,” which would mean, “stop being naive,” “stop living with your head in the sand”. A person always hopes that things will get better, at least go back to normal, the way they once were, “but realize this”, Paul tells Timothy, “difficult times are coming!” Those who love Jesus, live for Him, serve Him, and attempt to influence others to follow Him will be most hated by the world. I am reading a book written by a man who was a pastor in Romania during the Soviet years, who was severally tortured for his faith, and was incredibly strong and influenced many in spite of the times.

So what is it going to look like in the way of my lifestyle. Will I have a bunch of alarms and motion detectors on my place, big mean dogs, loaded guns. Will these evil people that are becoming more numerous around me be ones that I can influence, share Jesus with, teach the Bible to, or will they be pretty much beyond reaching.

So the admonition to me is, “be courageous, be strong, don’t fret or be anxious, and be ready, be prepared to make a difference with and in the lives of many. I can do that. It is easy for me, I am 72 in 4 days, it won’t be very many more years before I will be out of here. So I am determined to finish well, shift my life into high gear, live every day as if it is my last before I stand before Jesus and hear him say, “enter into the joy of your Master”! Probably going to be some exciting days ahead.

The Bible says that one of these days those who are alive and love Jesus will hear a trumpet sound and then they will be changed in a twinkling of an eye, then we will lift off from the ground and meet Jesus in the air and go to heaven with Him. It says that we are to encourage each other with these words. I think that the day is coming soon when this series of events will take place.

There are several very positive things about this event. The first is that we will get a new body. The body of our humble state will be changed into conformity with the body of Jesus by the exertion of the power that He has to conform everything to His will. I wonder almost continually what my new body will look like and what it will feel like and what I will be able to do, how strong I will be, how we move and travel and how smart will I be, how clear and powerful will be my thinking. If I am going to be just like the body of Jesus it is going to be amazing, for sure. My present body aches and hurts most of the time, but I just remind myself of my new body whenever the pain gets bad. Can’t come to soon for me.

The second cool thing is that we will be gone from this earth with all that is going on. I get so weary of all the conflict, with all the weirdness, with all the evil and it will be so refreshing to be in a perfect place with none of what we are experiencing now. A place of perfect beauty, amazing joy, and abounding love among all. The light at the end of the tunnel for sure. I truly believe it is any day now, so live like it.

One of the very important things in my life right now is that I remember to take my Parkinson’s medicine. I have forgotten, both that I hadn’t taken it and that I already had, and took it again, resulting in an ambulance ride to the hospital. The fact that I forgot doesn’t make taking my medicine at the right time unimportant in reality or in my mind, it is very important and I know that it is very important! So why do I forget? Because there are so many things going on in my life, with so much information coming into my head that I am supposed to remember that I just forget some things, and often what I forget is the most important things. I forgot Patty’s birthday once. That didn’t mean that it wasn’t important to me, it didn’t mean that she wasn’t important to me, and it certainly didn’t mean that I didn’t love her, it just meant that there was so much urgent stuff going on that I forgot, I do that. It wasn’t a big deal to Patty, she didn’t take it as me not caring for her, she just reminded me, I apologized, made it up to her, and back to life we went.

I regularly hear of couples having a conflict because one of them forgot a birthday, anniversary, an appointment, or some other significant thing resulting in hurt feelings, resulting in irritation, or anger, or sulking, or the silent treatment. It seems so much more mature and wise and peaceful just to graciously remind the forgetful one of whatever they forgot and to get on with life.

The problems come when the personal standards that we have set for our spouse that we use to determine our own worth and value in their eyes is not their standards. It helps immensely if couples communicate to each other what makes them feel loved and valued, rather than expecting that their mate know what it is intuitively.

On one of our dates Patty said to me, “Do you know what makes me feel very loved more than anything else you do?” I took a couple of guesses that were wrong, and she said, “when you listen to me attentively when I talk even when it isn’t about something you are particularly interested in.” Because I am always in a hurry to get something else checked off of my “to do” list I am not a very attentive listener, especially if the conversation goes very long or is about something I could care less about. As Patty shared this with me I recognized how important this was to her, and I also recognized what a bad job I had been doing at making my wife feel loved. Because I forget things, even important things, I wrote out a commitment statement that is part of my every morning prayer of commitment to the Lord. “Today Lord, I will love Patty the way You loved the church and gave Your life up for her, I will do this by listening attentively to her when she talks with me, and I will not become impatient when she talks for a long time or about something I am not interested in. Please help me to keep this commitment.”

The cool thing was that when I shared my personal commitment with her she asked what was the most important thing she could do to communicate her love to me, and I shared it with her.😘

1 Peter 3:7 You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way,

For years I considered 1 Peter 3:7 the hardest command in the Bible to obey, and at times thought it simply impossible. Then I changed my view and understanding of it as a result of a marriage seminar that JBC did via video years ago. The speaker said successfully doing this verse was very important to a healthy marriage, but then he said this incredibly freeing statement, “living with your wife in an understanding way doesn’t mean that you understand her, but it does mean that you need to learn how.” For some reason I thought I was supposed to figure it out on my own, or automatically know it intuitively, but the speaker said, “figuring it out on your own is impossible!” Hallelujah, I knew that! He said, “ask guys who have been married for 50 years who have good marriages, ask marriage counselors, read good books on marriage, and go to seminars.” Then he said this, “the best source for the information on how to live with your wife in an understanding way is your own wife!” I thought, yeh right! If I ask Patty she will tell me that I ought to know already! He went on to say, “word the questions wisely and ask on a date in a nice restaurant. “ So we went on a date to a nice restaurant that I planned and arranged for, including getting a babysitter, and after a nice dinner I asked this question, “I really want to be the kind of husband that will make you the happiest woman on the planet earth, but I don’t know how, I need for you to be my marriage manual, my coach. Could you share with me one thing that I could change, do better at, start doing ,or stop doing that would make you happy?” It has been so many years ago I don’t remember what she said, but I do remember that she wasn’t at all upset with the question and that the counsel she gave me seemed very reasonable and doable. And the other thing I remember is that she then asked me what one thing she could do to make me the happiest man on the planet earth. I do remember what I said!

When my Dad was dying from liver cancer I realized one day that I had never told him that I loved him. The reason was because he had never told me that he loved me. I did love my Dad very much and I knew that he loved me, we just didn’t say it, that wasn’t what he did. I decided that I wanted to tell him at least once that I loved him before he died so I called him up on the phone and talked for some time about a variety of topics but I couldn’t get up the nerve to say I love you before I hung up. I was was so upset with myself that I called him up again five minutes later, he was surprised to hear from me so soon, but we again talked for awhile and I again hung up without saying “I love you.” I called him up a third time and when he answered I said, “Hi Dad, this is Dee, I love you” , and I hung up. A few minutes later the phone rang, it was Dad, and he said, “I love you, too”, and he hung up.

In my journal I wrote, “Why was it so hard to tell my Dad I loved him?” As I was thinking about that I realized that Patty and I had been married for 20 years and I had never told her that I loved her. I made a goal to tell her 5 times every day that I loved her. I wrote the goal down and read it every day. Some days I forgot, and some days I forgot until I read my goals before going to bed so I would tell her 5 times in a row. My motive was to communicate to Patty that I loved her, my method to make it happen was my goal and reviewing my goal. I have a goal to pray with Patty 3 times minimum each week, and I have shared that goal with guys in my accountability groups who hold me accountable. My motive is to grow in unity and oneness with Patty and I know that praying together is a very powerful way to make that happen, plus I believe that the prayer of a husband and wife is the most powerful form of prayer that there is. My method to overcome my forgetfulness and business in life is a goal and accountability to others. Patty appreciates my desire to be a good husband and spiritual leader in our marriage, and she doesn’t get offended by my method.

I often hear of wives being upset at the fact that her husband is praying with her because of a goal and accountability, or that he is taking her on a date once a week for the same reason. When they get upset they are forgetting a very important point, the motive of their husband in praying with them or taking them on a date is that he wants to please his wife, he wants to make his marriage better, he wants to be the spiritual leader in his marriage, the goal and accountability to others for the goal is the method of making it happen, motives and methods are way different.

Wives who can’t appreciate their husbands desire to do the things that will make her happy, who can’t appreciate the fact that he is trying hard to grow as a husband because he is using a method to help him be successful, are the kind of wives that will soon have husbands that will quit trying.

Men are mechanical in their pursuit of success in every area of their life, that is they need tools. My Dad used to say, “there isn’t anything you can’t accomplish if you have the right tools.” Goals, accountability, counseling, and reminders are tools, methods, and they work.

Wives, be part of the solution to your less than perfect marriage by appreciating very much, the fact that your husband wants to get better so much so, that he is using good tools to make it happen. If you don’t appreciate his desire and motive because of his reliance on a tool you will be the problem.

The most critical element in a perfect marriage is communication. Not just information sharing but real, personal, intimate communication. One of the best tools to make it happen is dating. Our own home often is a barrier to intimate communication because of all the distractions. The kind of communication that effectively builds unity in the relationship takes time and in our own homes there are so many things that interrupt before much time can be spent on a regular basis. Kids, television, grandkids, our regular activities that we can see reminders of as we try to talk, cell phones, and a hundred other things. Also we get programmed in our home to just give information because of the schedules we keep we are usually in a hurry to do something or go someplace.

A husband who plans a date communicates value and worth to his wife. My personal goal is to plan a date once a week with Patty. We don’t make that goal, but we do probably average about 3 times each month. Our favorite date is to go to a restaurant because it lends itself to conversation sitting on opposite sides of a table making eye contact, waiting for our food and eating casually and drinking a cup of coffee after the meal. There is easily an hour of talking about a lot of different things but because of the time available it is much more intimate than normal conversation that happens on the fly in our everyday life.

In the early days of our marriage we didn’t have a lot of money so we seldom had a full meal, often just a piece of pie and a cup of coffee and many times just the coffee. We often would get a baby sitter after the kids were all in bed and go to WinCo shopping. I would push the cart and follow Patty as she put groceries in it. Then we would go to Shari’s restaurant which was a couple of blocks down the road from WinCo, both which were open 24 hours a day, and have a piece of pie. We sometimes would get just one piece, and split it, and get a cup of coffee or even just a glass of water, and talk for an hour.

Because of our regular times of talking we would both postpone talking about things that bugged us, or events where we were hurt or offended until we went on our date. Because of the delay we were usually much less emotion about the event and could talk about it calmly and rationally, and arrive at a solution or reconciliation. Because we planned on talking about things that were tough we approached the time much less defensively than if we discussed it at home impulsively.

We also have driving dates where we will drive up to see family or some other location, and talk in the car on the way. We both talk well in the car sitting next to each other, and there are no interruptions.

Patty and I have been married 51 years, raised 8 kids, have been very busy with ministry in our church, and have a very good marriage. I know that a key reason why is the regular times of escaping from the regular routines if life to connect.