Patty and I will have been married 50 years this coming August, and we have, I am quite sure, the best marriage in the history of mankind. The reason is that we have established some rules that we follow in our treatment of each other. They aren’t written down, and we have never formally declared these to be the 10 commandments of a great marriage, but they are very real and strong commitments that we both practice.
1. Anger is never acceptable in our communication, and in our problem solving and dealing with our frustrations with life and each other, not even a little bit.
2. We can communicate frustration and discontentment with each other, but never in a way that dishonors or tears down, never scolding or shaming.
3. We both have flaws and defects in our character and behavior, but we both are so much better than we were when we first got married, so let’s major on the positives, we appreciate each other’s strengths.
4. We do not restrict the others freedom to serve, to develop our giftedness, or to be involved in our church. We will not be overly dependent on our mate so that we become jealous and controlling of their time away from us.
5. We never deny sex to each other, even if we are tired.
6. We are always eager to serve each other, no matter how long the “honey do” list.,
7. We do not correct our spouse in public
8. We pray with each other, and for each other.
9. We will forgive each other quickly of any offense
10. We will laugh at each other’s dumb moves, but never humiliate.