I had a steelhead fishing trip arranged for tomorrow. I called the guide that took my two sons last week and they landed 8 steelhead and brought home two that were hatchery fish and booked a trip with him. Looking at their pictures and listening to their stories got me all excited about going. Then the guide texted today and said that there was a chance we would cancel tomorrow because the forcast was for a lot of rain tonight and the river would be out of shape.I started hoping that it would rain because I was feeling tired and really didn’t want to get up at 4:30 and sit in the cold all day. It wasn’t that long ago that I would have been hyper about going steelhead fishing. He texted a few minutes ago and said the trip was a “go”, weather was fine. I let out a big sigh, and if Patty had heard and asked what the problem was I would have said, “I have to go fishing tomorrow”. She probably would have laughed thinking I was joking. I am pretty sure when the alarm goes off in the morning I will jump out of bed and that I will have a great time tomorrow. This feeling of “dread” has become more frequent of late. I love preaching but I find myself dreading the study and preparation for the next weeks sermon. It usually starts on Sunday afternoon. I love speaking for two days at our annual seminar at our church on prayer and leadership, but right now I am dreading it. It is easy to see why some when they get older tend to sit a lot, watch TV a lot, and are fairly inactive, it just feels good. But I am determined to sprint across the finish line of my life so controlling my self talk is super important. I will write tomorrow about my trip and tell you how many fish I caught.