If we have worked at it and have become skilled at making goals for our own life that fit and help us to prioritize our time and energy, and to motivate ourselves to be high producers in life, and to be those who are growing and changing in character steadily we can use the skill of goal setting to help others to conquer bad habits, to be high achievers, and to grow as people. When a friend, or family member or work associate tells us their troubles or problems, most of us just give some good advice. Good advice makes us and them feel good but nothing will usually change. What works effectively is if we help them set a goal that will move them to success to fixing or overcoming the situation they are in. If a friend says, “my marriage isn’t going very well right now”. You could give some marriage advice or counselimg which he probably won’t remember and it is even less likely that he will do it. A better response would be, ” Hey, I have a set of 6 DVDs on how to improve your marriage. I listened to them a couple years ago, and boy did they help make a huge difference in our marriage. How about you listen to one each week and we can get together for coffee each week and talk about how to put what you learned into practice.” If you are working on you aggressively it is amazing how many opportunities will open up to you and the wisdom you will have to help. When you are leading yourself effectively you can then lead others effectively.